Monday, November 2, 2015

Day 1 - Birth

Day 1, the first day of my blog. The beginning of a new creation, this is the birth of an idea. I plan to blog for 10 days about the memories of my life, before my memories are gone from this plague they call Multiple Sclerosis. 

Long ago I came to be on day 1, the first day of my life. It was June 8, 1966. I sometimes wonder what that day was like. Was it gloomy or fair? Did the birds outside the hospital window sing in joy?Did I cry or smile in awe as I came to be in this world? Was my mother screaming in pain or delight or was it a bit of both? I wish I could go there and see for a moment my arrival though the birth canal as I first saw my parents faces as I entered the light.

It wasn't until many years later that I would watch in amazement as my own children came into this beautiful world. I can only imagine that the endearment which I underwent each time at that precise moment they arrived was similar to what my own mother endured . I remember how awe struck I was that day as I held each one for the first time peering at their tiny features as I stroked their perfect little fingers as they grasped mine. Is this what my mother and father experienced?

Through the years there have been many first days, school, work, even the beginning of a trip to a far away place. None could ever compare to the birth of a child. Nothing I do today, tomorrow, next year will ever be more perfect then those 4 days so long ago.

Still, I can only pretend to know what it was like that day 49 years ago. I can only antisipate that my mother felt the same way. Was there still that glimmer of love in my parents eyes or had the slow cracking of the shell which encased their love already begun to crack. Did they look at me with hope or dispare, another life clenched in the perils of what was inevidable?

There is no way for me to ever really know. My mother has been gone for 27 years now and my father left this place 5 years ago so there is no asking them. So I can only imagine. Still, as the saying goes, I sure wish I could have been a fly on the wall that day.

I bet the birds where singing.